The funny thing about respect is, as women, if we don’t feel loved, we don’t give respect. This creates a vicious cycle of selfishness in your marriage. She doesn’t show me respect, so I won’t show her love. He doesn’t show me love, so he doesn’t deserve my respect. That’s where we are wrong! The Bible doesn’t say, WHEN your husband outwardly shows you love, then you should respect him. No, it’s a command with no fine print added.
Do you want to feel love from your husband? Do you want attention? Then try something for me stop nagging, questioning, and criticizing everything your spouse does. But Bethany, I’ve been doing that for years and nothing has changed. Friend, it will never change doing things your way. Stay committed in your prayers and let God’s light be a witness to your husband by your words and actions of respect. It’s not the easy way, but it’s God’s way, the right way.
As Valentine’s Day approaches, take time to evaluate yourself. Don’t worry about what your husband is or isn’t doing, rather, ask God to help you be the wife He has created you to be.
“What if God designed marriage to make us holy more than to make us happy?” -Gary Thomas
The truth is, marriage makes us confront our ugly that we may have ignored before. Just try to walk around the house with an attitude for a couple of days, or couple of hours in our house, it won’t last long without noticing. Our spouse challenges us in good and sometimes bad ways. Thankfully, we have God to lean on, in times of frustration, when the wrong buttons have been pushed.
We need to accept and remember from the moment we said “I do” you gave up “me” and replaced it with “us”. You quickly learn not everything you do is perfect and your opinions are not facts. Marriage is amusing, intriguing, and beautiful, but it’s design is greater than our happiness.
Marriage provides growth as an individual and as a Christian. It is a constant reminder of what commitment and covenant means. It also teaches us how to forgive time and time again, like our Heavenly Father forgives us.
Friend, the moment you think your marriage is all about “your” happiness, you’re in trouble.